Habit four of Sean Covey's book The Seven Habits to Highly effective teens, Sean Covey states that "Think win-win is and attituede toward life, a mental fram of mind that says i can win and so can you."According to him not everyone has a win-win attitude. In face there are many different attitudes people in todays society thinks with. Such as the win-lose attitude, the lose-win attitude, the lose-lose attitude and of course the win-win.
The win-lose attitude,totem pole, says "I don't care how good I am as long as I'm a notch higher than you are." The world has trained us to think win-lose but win-lose always backfires. The totem pole always has one loser left on the bottom and the winner to rub it in his face sits at the top. Everyone thinks win-lose sometimes but its important not to stay in that way of thinking because you become filled with pride.
The doormat, lose-win, say's I dont like to fight so I'll let you win. Yes, this attitude is perfect for situations where you don't care either way, but you should always know when to back down and when to stand strong. If your attitude is lose-win you will always be following everyone else just to please them. Everyone steps on a lose-win person. That is why it is called the doormat.
The lose-lose or downward spiral attitude thinks "If Im going down, then you're going down with me!" Lose-lose occurs mostly when two win-lose people get together. Lose-lose is nothing you want to be associated with in any situation. Then of course win-win says I can win and so can you! When you have a win -win attitude all your relationships flourish. At times it can seem almost impossible to have a win-win attitude but it always pays off in the end.
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Paradigms
According to The Seven Habits of Highly Effective Teens by Sean Covey paradigms are perceptions about the way things are and are usually untrue and incomplete. Paradigms,of yourself, usually hold you back. An example of that would be when i was in elementary and middle school.
I was rather shy and quiet. I had friends but I was too scared to talk to other kids, especially the popular kids. I thought if I was outgoing they would not like me and the would think i was odd. I was afraid I would be made fun of. Eventually, in the fourth grade, I made friends that made me feel comfortable enough to be myself. They were fun and loud and people still liked them. Since fourth grade i have become much more of a people person. I am not shy or quiet in the least and I make new friends everyday.
The paradigm I had about myself is that people would not like the real me. However, I came to find out the people i cared about liked me being myself and once I got used to it I did not care if other people didn't like it.
I was rather shy and quiet. I had friends but I was too scared to talk to other kids, especially the popular kids. I thought if I was outgoing they would not like me and the would think i was odd. I was afraid I would be made fun of. Eventually, in the fourth grade, I made friends that made me feel comfortable enough to be myself. They were fun and loud and people still liked them. Since fourth grade i have become much more of a people person. I am not shy or quiet in the least and I make new friends everyday.
The paradigm I had about myself is that people would not like the real me. However, I came to find out the people i cared about liked me being myself and once I got used to it I did not care if other people didn't like it.
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